This is Classic Avasha

My G1 has a camcorder and apparently the kids have been taking my phone and recording “shows” on it. I found out when my SD card was showing Card full message. This is Avasha being bossy as only a older sister can be. (Take note at 46 secs)The video is shaky and at times, you can barely hear the kids  but I laughed out loud at them

 

ETA: Samar is crying  because Neil wasnt letting him talk. I have camera hungry children. Also rude commenter, he has bad,bad execma under his eyes. I brought him to the doctor yesterday and he actually has an infection because of severe scratching. He is now taking predinsolone, cephalexin and is using a $25 5 mg tube of cream. Thanks for being sacarstic and making me feel shitty!

How to bring 3 or more children out alone

 

My 3rd child is 10 months old and I am wondering how you manage to bring all of them out by yourself. Getting in and out of the car has become a pain. I have been actually staying at home to avoid going out. Can you give me some tips?

 

I received another email. On a completely different topic. (You guys like how I flick posts topics from other bloggers  and/or tags and/or emails.) Coming back to the email.I never stay home with the kids. Only when we are sick do we stay home. I find that if we are out doing something, even if its something as simple as going to the local park, everyone stays sane. There is less fighting, the kids get tired, Mummy’s happy.

It has become so much easier now that the girls are bigger and Samar is walking. But during the long darks days of having 3 under the ages of 5, I remember asking for tips, watching what other people do and also trusting myself that I could do it. My mom left after 6 weeks. In fact, right on the day of my 6 week pp appt. I had to start doing preschool drop off and pick up. I recall being in my last month of pregnancy and having fears of losing a kid while shopping. Or being homebound until the baby turned 5. But the thing is, I survived.It took a while and then we all settled into a routine.Some of the things that worried me are listed below.

Unloading the kids from the van.When Samar was less than 6 months old, I used a sling for short trips(pharmacy,post office). I park the van, take him out, put him in sling, take Neil out and Avasha is out by herself. I have a huge phobia of parking lot. I saw some article abt the children being crushed because the driver couldnt see them while backing out. So I have to hold onto to everyone. I have Samar in the sling, am holding Neil’s hand and Avasha holds to my shirt/pants. Then we start walking. If I am using the stroller, then the boys are strapped in, and the girls are holding each side of the stroller.The stroller, take and unfold the stroller first, place diaper bag in basket and then get kids out. It sounds like a no brainer but sometimes one forgets the simple stuff.

After Samar turned one, I unstrapped Neil first(his seat is on the drivers side), close that side on van door, bring him to the pavement, ask him to hold onto the van  AND  NOT  TO MOVE FROM THAT SPOT, take Samar out, and then we start walking. I dont remember where I learnt of this  placing one hand on the van door or wall till we are ready to move. But its a brilliant idea. Simple and effective. I always use it and Neil never moves until I am ready.

Planning Simple Things: We always do simple things, like going to the zoo. And if at the zoo, the kids want to sit and collect leaves and rocks, we let them. I dont move anyone until everyone is ready. Likewise at the beach, if they are happy up away from the water,digging into the sand, I let them. I dont say things, lets go to the water or lets go to the tide pools. I dont care what they do as long as it is safe. This is why we seldom go to places like Six flags and such. It requires way too much organizing. We can do that when Samar turns 5.

All I can say is that it will get easier. As the kids get older, it will be that much easier to get in and out of the house. I hope this helps you S.

He is going to owe me big

Looks bad

This happened this morning.I was sleeping on the bed. Nk was ironing on the bed. The HOT  iron was upright on my side of the bed. He shouted something at the kids and I straightened my legs and the damm iron fell on top of my foot. It hurts like a bitch.Nk got all freaked out and ran to get me a cold compress. I was angry, shouting how many  times have I told not to use the fucking iron on the bed. He mumbles something abt me sleeping in and its 8.30 and if I had woken up, I wouldnt have be burnt.Then he says do we need to go to a doctor. I told him no, you go to work before I scream more at you. 

Kiran, the tag is the last thing on my mind. I want to kill him right now.

 ETA This Morning

 

Avasha turns 7 tomorrow

Eight Legged Monster

My 2nd child is turning 7. How is that possible. How can  my kids be growing up so fast and not need me as much. How is that even possible? 

Avasha is the one who challenges me the most. She questions each and everything I ask her to do.She knows how to push all my buttons. Asking her to put away her own laundry is a huge battle. She will throw her crocs and then not pick them up until I threatened to cut off her comp time.She is also the one who says YOU ARE NOT THE BOSS OF ME. I shout back, YES I AM.

As naughty as a bunny

But she is also the sweetest out of the lot. She will give her up her candy if her brothers are crying. She will come massage my head when I have a headache. She has been pounding the ginger for my afternoon chai every single day this summer. She sits down and conducts lessons for the younger kids. She has a small clipboard and a whiteboard. She would make them say their colors, list the alphabet, and just recently started teaching Neil rhyming words.

I know I am hard on her and I shouldnt compare her to Ashwina. I hated it when my mom use to do and yet sometimes I find myself saying it. She isnt that much into reading as Ashwina is. She will read 4 pages and then ask, is this enough. She is much more physical. She has been practicing hard on jump rope right. She wants to do forward/backward and cross rope. She loves to kick a soccer ball around and is very competitive abt winning.She learnt the monkey bars much earlier than Ashwina did.

She also has an excellent singing voice.Ashwina and I are both tone deaf. We cannot carry a tune. She on the other hand, has a decent singing voice and is always humming and singing something.

I can go on and on abt her but I will stop. She is just like her name, Avasha which means independent.

 Check out her singing

 Convo when she was younger

Differences between the 1st and 4th pregnancy

Ro wrote a post abt the differences between her first and  2nd pregnancies Chox then left a comment wondering what did people do different  in their 3rd and more pregnancies. Since, I am always up for stealing ideas from other posts, I thought I write my own post.

• Your 4th pregnancy, you drive yourself to the L&D, when in labour Actually I blogged abt it here.
• You also argue with the doctor that YOU ARE NOT IN LABOUR.
• Your spouse also decides to skip the abovementioned ER visit.
• You self diagnose yourself before going to the doc. Bell’s Palsy
• After birth (still in the hospital), you are  eating toast, reading the magazine and  breastfeeding the baby. The Lactation counsellor pokes her head in and laughs, and says I am not needed here.
• You tend to ignore the weird aches and pains and not be constantly calling the office as one tends to do withe their first.
• The months seems to fly away, because you are busy running after the older 3.Sometimes, you look down on your tummy and realise oh you are preggo.
•  You also confuse all your pregnancies up. Sometimes, I wonder what I am saying, did it happen with the 2nd or the 3rd or the last one. I seriously cannot remember.
• You fall down pretty  bad and you know it doesnt warrant a ER trip.
• You also already live in maternity clothes. You dont need to go out to buy anything
• You already have everything you need from the previous pregnancies. The baby is all set. maybe newborn diapers?

 In short, Chox  basically one tends to forget one’s preggo when you are dealing with the other kids at home. When Samar was born, I had an infant, Neil just turned 2 and Avasha was 4.5 yrs old. I seriously dont remember how I got through those long long days and night. Wait i remember. I drank!

Myths About Strength Training

I am just apprehensive about it because of the amount involved. Also I heard they make you do weights a lot and I  dont want to start having big muscles, biceps etc na, so I am just a bit confused. What do you suggest?

The above is from an email I received. I have also heard from women that lifting weights will make one have bulky muscles. All these are FALSE. I dont know where women heard them from(most likely from men who wanted them to stay away from the free weights room.)

The men who have bulging muscles lift extremly heavy weights. Women have lower testosterone levels than men. The only way women can get as muscular as man is by using  steroids.Stop worrying that you will look like the Incredible Hulk. That is not going to happen, unless you are freak. Then I am sorry. Kidding. Its not going to happen, but check out the reasons to ad strength training to your routine

Reasons to Strength Train:

1.You will gain muscle and lose body fat, which in turns lead to a higher metabolism. A lb of muscle will burn 30-40 more calories than fat. You will weigh the same but look much smaller because  you will be toned. You will get many, many compliments on how much weight you lost but we know the secret, dont we?

2. Strength training will make you more confident, more stronger and more flexible. Picking up the baby and the 2 gallons of milk wouldnt seem that big of a deal. Carrying your sleeping 7 yr old from the van to the bed will seem that much easier. I regularly challenge NK to arm wrestle. I havent won YET but he has to really struggle to win against me.

3. Strength training will increase and restore your bone density. I know we are all young and the thought of having osteoporosis is almost nil. But the fact is, we are all getting older and the bone is losing its mineral density. Cardio isnt going to do shit for your bones.

Just by adding a strength training routine to your workout 3x a week, you will start seeing definition in your arms, legs in 4-6 weeks.

I have been doing free weights and circuit training for the past  year. The reason I got a trainer was that I was stuck doing the same things and I wasn’t seeing results. She said , I was lifting too small a weight to have any impact on my body/muscles. I was doing biceps/triceps with 5 lbs and 8 lbs dumbbells. During my first training session, she said that looks too easy for you. I should be struggling to lift the last 2 reps in my set. If I am not, then its too easy. 

Today, I use 12.5-15, 17.5  dumbells depending on what I am doing. She also has me do 2 major muscle groups at once. A squat followed by a shoulder press. A crunch holding a medicine ball. A lunge followed a hammer curl. 

So my dear sisters in the battle against weight loss, we need to add strength training.

Tips on Travelling Alone with Kids

After boasting about flying alone with 4 kids here and here, I figured it was time I posted abt my travels.

I have done many flights with my kids always ALONE.  My first ever was with Ashwina when she was 11 weeks old(1999 OMFG). We did a straight 15 hour flight from Singapore to London. Then I landed up in Boston in the dead of winter and couldnt deal with 3p/m  darkness and decided to fly back home. The return  flight was when she was 9 months old, Boston to Heathrow to Singapore. I have done shorter Indian flights which doesnt even bear mentioning, because they are less than 5-6 hours long.

My first flight with all 3 was back in 2005, Singapore to Mumbai. I survived that. Then I threw up on myself during the return flight from Mumbai to Singapore.

 I flew with all 3 kids(6,3 and 8 months) from Singapore to LA. Our flight from Taipei to LA was delayed by 3-4 hours. I remember b/f Neil , sitting on the floor, realising with a panic that Avasha had disappeared and, running through the lounge with my boob exposed because Avasha got onto the travelator thing.

The latest flight  I took was May last year, when we went home to Singapore. I had to either choose between suffering through 26 hours flying and spending 5 extra weeks with my mom or travelling with NK and spending just 3 weeks. I chose the 26 hour flight alone.  That flight gets special mention. Flying with 4 got me so many looks and whispers throughout the airport.

At SFO airport, I remember, I had Samar in the sling and the younger threee were walking, the double stroller was loaded with all their hand luggage and I was being paged at the SQ desk.. When I said, yes I am Sraikh. She said are you  with all of them by yourself. I said yes and I swear, her eyes bulged out.  They didnt have the bassinet for Samar even though I had booked it. Because my flight from Denver was late and I hadnt done some check in thing, they gave it away. I said okay so whats the next best thing you can do for me? They hemmed and hawed. I stood my ground and they finally  located an empty seat and gave it to Neil And I. So we had 3 seats to ourselves and the girls were behind us.

When we were walking through the airport, people were literally starring and looking behind me to check whether there was another adult coming to help me. At the security check point, the lady said, God bless your heart. It was really interesting to see everyone’s reaction.  

• Understand that thinking about the whats if is much more scarier than the actual flight.
• Order child’s meal for the kids
• Request that your stroller be brought at every transit point
• Pack a change of clothes for yourself
• Let everyone  else disembark first. Be the last to get off the plane. It isnt  a freaking race. There is no prize.
• Ask the flight people to hold the baby or  to sit on your seat when you use the bathroom.
• Wrap some new toys up in pretty wrapping paper and use tons of tape. Throw them out at crucial points( take-off and landing)
• Ignore any and all rules you have about candies and chips and soda. Anything goes to keep the child happy.
• Head to the bathrooms on every transit
• Realise that people can be shitty and learn to ignore it
• Order a drink when the cart comes around.Make it a strong one if possible
• Pack a first aid kit, band aids, Tylenol, Advil(Adult strength as well), Vicks for dry noses and Neosporin.
• Smile and take things calmly. If you are calm, your kids will be calm as well.
• Tell yourself that you can relax as soon as you hit your destination.

My kids are really good about flying. They watched the inflight entertainment. I have given new toys to them. They color, they did playdoh, they cut up  inflight magazine and pasted  it on scrapbooks I had. Now, my next trip back to Singapore wouldnt be until 2011(unless we strike the lottery) and I am looking forward to that because I would nt have an infant to worry abt and I think I could actually enjoy my meal in peace. With a 12,9,7 and 5 yr old,pfff that is like child’s play

Running /Weight Loss Update

 Its been more than a month since my last  update( is time flying for anyone else or is it just me).

My trainer last week had me  do supersets. I never even heard of that term, let alone try doing. Supersets are basically doing 2 sets of exercises  in a row with no rest in between. You can chose to exercises the same muscle or do different muscles.The reasoning behind supersets are many.(Google is your friend. Am too lazy too). This is what I did

12 reps of 12.5 lb bicep curl- switch to 10 lbs and do hammer curls rest 1 min(she times me) and repeat x 3.

12 rep squats with shoulder press 15 bs switch to 12.5 and do single leg lunges rest 1 min and then do repeat x4

45 lbs 12 rep  3 sets of chest bench presses

40 lbs 12 rep 3 sets  incline bench press

Triceps extension 60 lbs on the pulley machine, switch the arms to the outside of the rope, drop to 50 and do another 12. Repeat x 3

Lie down on Bosu ball, crunch lft hand to right knee, 12 times, switch legs another 12 times and then do straight up 12 crunches. x3.

I was exhausted. It was painful to even drive home after working out. My arms the next day werent so bad, but the little muscle right under the armpit hurt alot.

My week look(s )like that:

Sunday(21th June)-3 mile run
Mon-Yoga class + weights/Ab work
Tue-off
Wed-Worked out with Trainer doing those exercises
Thursday-Swim/Run on treadmill/Ab work/
Friday-Weights/Ab work/Spinning
Sat-off
Sunday-4.2 mile run
Monday-Spinning/Ab work/ Swim
Tuesday(Today)-Met with Trainer and she did a whole another routine(if anyone is interested let me know I will type it out)
Wed-4 mile run at 14 min per mile pace(which let me tell is slooooow)
Thurs-Trainer Again
Friday- Ab work/Spinning(maybe?)
Sat (July 4th)- My 5k Race woohoo
Sun -Off

 Without further ado, here my current pictures. When I showed the pictures below to my kids, Neil asked is there 10 differences and do we  get a prize. I dont see much difference between the May and June wala pictures. ( Oh I just noticed a typo in the middle set. Its April 15th ,not 30th in the middle set) When I see pictures of myself, I go, arggh look at my belly. Arggh look at the double chin. And not to mention my flabby flabby arms.. I dont see a slimmer *cough* size 8-10 *cough* Sraikh. I still see the size 18 person I was. And I am not that person anymore. I run, I lift weights, I spin. All things which I couldnt do before. I need to change  my mental image.

 

My sisters are going to say I have too much time and that I am obsessed and also that I have become extremely vain. But thats what sisters do?

Awesome? Whats that?

MGM tagged me to do this. Write down 7 things I am awesome. (I can already see my trolls coming and saying mean stuff) I have been thinking abt what makes me awesome? If I am even awesome..anyways heres the list

1.I took a 26 hour flight with all 4 kids last year. ALONE.Colorado to SFO, go through security. Try folding up a double stroller, while having 8 peices of hand luggage, and a 3 and 1 yr old clinging to each leg. SFO to Seoul. Again the same security thing.. Seoul to Singapore. Trying going to the duty free shop to buy cheap Vodka with 4 cranky kids. Just try it!

2.I speak 4 languages. Malay which I took in school. Mandarin which I learnt from friends and neighbours. I can curse you and your ancestors in 4 languages. Enough said.

3. I always try to look for the good in things.Got laid off from work, okay we get to move again. Child diagnosed with allergies, at least it just eczema and not respiratory issues. Flat tyre, at least it happened at home and not out on the freeway.

4.I am still married. I got married at 20, had my first child at 22. Statistically speaking I should have been a divorcee by now.People in Singapore start whispering that if I come back and visit my mom without NK for more than 2 months, rumours start flying that he left me. Instead I would be celebrating my 12 years anniv this Dec.

5.My weightloss. From a person who used to find shortcuts during the 2.4km run at PE class to running 4 miles(ahem this morning) is nothing short of amazing.

6.My sense of humour. That what gets me through the dumb trolls, the stupid 4 child comments.

7. God this is hard. I am done. I cannot think of anything else.

I tag

1.Sonia (my sister who just started writing a blog)

2. Joe

3.Mimi

4.2bsmommy

5.Suma(Maybe this will help the block?)

6.Abha

7.La Vida Loca

8.Munchkin’s Mom
Anyone else who wants to do it?

Will you say you cannot afford it?

Conversation  this morning was about  going   to various summers camps and whose kid is doing what camp. I said we are only doing swimming for the girls and the boys will do one week  in their preschool. I simply cannot afford $250-$300 per week summer camps. If I put Ashwina in, then Avasha will want to do it as well and I simply dont have $600 lying around to spend on them.

Wednesday at a friends house, we were having a fantastic playgroup. There were 8 kids and no one fought and no one whined. I was telling the other 2 moms about Ashwina’s latest craze, beading(I should show you guys her necklaces and bracelets) and I looked up beading classes and found one class which was $280 for a 4 day -2 hour each day camp. Again I used the words I cannot afford it.

So that got me thinking. I dont hear anyone else saying it. Ever. I say it all the time, whether its for private school or T&C Beaches resort or a $200 Coach handbag. I simply dont have the finances to spend any money on such stuff and I dont mind people letting know I cannot afford them. But I  have yet to hear any of my friends say it back.

What about you guys? Do you say it? Do you have a friend who has 5 kids and says it all the time? Do you have someone who says it and then goes out and buys a $200 shoe?